很多媽媽都有一個同感﹐就是﹐有了孩子之後﹐就好像沒有了自己 - 沒有了私人的時間﹐沒有了carefree的歲月﹐沒有了這﹐沒有了哪。這一點﹐對於母乳媽媽﹐和一些沒grandparents代湊孩子的更甚。
當然我也經歷過很‘頹喪’的日子﹐覺得世上沒有人明白我﹐沒有人幫到我﹐感覺很絕望 - 這個通常在自己已很累 (如大姨媽快到訪時) 或 有病的時候最明顯。
經過幾個月來努力地嘗試兼顧事業和家庭﹐我領悟了一些﹕
一﹐我不是超人。 我也需要休息﹐我也需要私人空間。 所以我決定不再做事﹐和在真的需要時﹐我會大叫要楊爸爸接手 - 畢竟﹐孩子他也是有份兒的。
二﹐有些東西是迫不來的。 孩子不要睡﹐不要吃﹐不要拉﹐無論怎樣迫也是徒勞無功。其實有時可以放開點﹐不需要理會別人孩子是怎樣﹐不需要看書說孩子‘該怎樣生活’。每一個人也不同﹐硬是要把寶寶放在一個‘理想’模式中只會讓媽媽身心疲累。我總不信天下孩子都是七時上床﹔如果是的話﹐就當我們是活在溫哥華時間吧。因此﹐我們早已放棄要寶寶七(or九時)上床了。
眾媽媽﹐下次感到‘頹喪’的時候﹐想一想﹐不多幾多時日﹐寶寶就會變成大人﹐到時你想他/她黏你就很難了﹔現在生活可能很累﹐很枯糙﹐不過﹐明天又是新的﹐美好的一天 - Tomorrow will be a better day!
共勉之~
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