Gather ’round, kiddies, for I will tell you the story of the dreaded “Man-Nami”. The Man-Nami is a dreaded combination of physics, flesh and bone, and utter inconsideration. Yes, such a thing exists. Fortunately, it can only be located in one location: Cubao. Cubao is the land of the lawless, NO MAN’S LAND. Sure it may have good things such as malls and bargains and such but it is also a breeding place of malice and destruction. Located in the Cubao part of Edsa (the main artery of the Metro) is the “Temple of the Damned” where the Man-Nami takes place every 5 minutes or so from 8am to maybe around 10am and 6pm to 10pm. The Temple is so evil that any innocent commoner is converted once he/she reaches the topmost area of the edifice. All humanity and respect is left behind and greed, and rage takes over. Why would such a terrible thing happen you ask? Well, “City Wurm” or MRT for short transports people to certain points of the city. Commuters such as myself see the wurm as a boon for it bypasses the clogged veins of the city, ensuring a speedy trip. The trade-off (yep all good things have trade-offs) is that the wurm MUST pass through the temple. Now, think this through: with the temple brimming with people with a 28 days later-esque zombie determination who are also in need of transportation, it’s safe to assume that once the wurm (which is probably swelling with passengers has almost no room for more people already) arrives, it’s EVERY MAN, WOMAN, CHILD, OLD PERSON, PARAPLEGIC, DISABLED, WHITE/BLUE/POPPED/NO COLLAR FOR HIMSELF/HERSELF. At that exact point, the Man-Nami appears and no one is safe. 

Unless you’re prepared.

With my unparalleled experience when it comes to riding the wurm, I have drawn albeit crudely a diagram that, IF FOLLOWED and UNDERSTOOD CORRECTLY, will ensure safety from the Man-Nami. Be prepared, the Man-Nami is as brutal as it is fast so one should prepare ahead of time and strategize. The most important thing to remember when riding the wurm is WHERE you’re getting off. One must position himself/herself so that it will ensure close proximity to the door. Don’t get it? Take a look at this:

Here’s the lowdown: The red lines indicate the flow of the man-nami and they usually converge in the middle and there it will end. You should NEVER be in the middle unless you’re getting off at one of the last 3 stops. If you’re getting off 1/2/3/4 stops AFTER cubao, you should stay in the numbered areas for they will ensure a direct route to the coveted exit. Train location knowledge is really important because it will help you adapt during an emergency.  

Why am I doing this? Let’s just say you don’t want to end up in a shouting match with an inconsiderate lout at 8.30 in the morning.

Ta.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, October 2nd, 2007 at 11:26 am and is filed under Think it through. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.