Men have rules too you know.. its just
that hey’re not too whiny…

The Guy’s Side:
Now here are the
rules from the male side. These are our rules!
Please note … these are all numbered “1″ ON
PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big
girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up,
you need it down. You don’t hear us complaining
about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday = sports. It’s like the full moon or
the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never
going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on
this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong
hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers
to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want
help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is
what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a
problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible
in an argument. In fact, all comments become
null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won’t dress like the Victoria’s Secret
girls, don’t expect us to act like soap opera
guys.

1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are.
Don’t ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two
ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or
angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell
us how you want it done. Not both. If you
already know best how to do it, just do it
yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you
have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions
and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows
default settings. Peach, for example, is a
fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We
have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do
that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you
say “nothing,” we will act like nothing’s wrong.
We know you might be lying, but it is just not
worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don’t want an
answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to
hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely
anything you wear is fine. Really.

1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless
you are prepared to discuss such topics as
baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster
trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

1. Thank you for reading this;
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch
tonight, but did you know men really don’t mind
that, it’s like camping.
Pass this to as many women as you
can - to give them an education

Cheers!

I was born intelligent -
Education ruined me.

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Practice makes perfect…..
But nobody’s perfect….. .
So why practice?

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If it’s true that we are here to help others,
Then what exactly are the others here for?

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Since light travels faster than sound,
People appear bright until you hear them speak.

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How come “abbreviated” is such a long word?

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Money is not everything.
There’s Mastercard & Visa.

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�

If your father is a poor man,
It is your fate but,
If your father-in-law is a poor man,
It’s your stupidity.

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Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two woman.

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Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing in
Life.

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The wise never marry.
And when they marry they become otherwise.

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Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.

………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……..

Never put off the work till tomorrow
What you can put off today.

………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… …….

“Your future depends on your dreams”
So go to sleep

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There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning

………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ..

“Hard work never killed anybody”
But why take the risk

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“Work fascinates me”
I can look at it for hours

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God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.

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The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. Why learn.

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A bus station is where a bus stops.

A train station is where a train stops.

On my desk, I have a work station….
What more can I say……..