|All right, here it is! Fifty-one ways to identify whether you’re a victim of demon-possession:
1. Go look in a mirror. I’m serious! Look at your reflection! What color are your irises? If you answered red or purple, then mark one on your tally.
2. Keep looking at your irises. Are they slightly different colors? If you answered yes, then add one mark to your tally.
3. I am going to say a word in a few seconds. Write somewhere on that sheet of paper the first thing that comes to your mind when I say this word. Are you ready? Okay. Here comes the word. Satan. I hope your writing what comes to your mind instead of reading this sentence first. Okay, if you wrote something like “fallen angel,” “God’s foe,” “mortal enemy,” or “vicious dirt bag” then you’re okay. But if you wrote “My master who I will obey and worship for the rest of my pathetic life” (it’s usually almost those exact same words) then place a mark on your tally.
4. Did somebody who you do not know ever tell you that you are possessed by demons? If so, add a mark.
5. Has an inanimate object ever told you that you are possessed by demons? Inanimate objects, in this case, are likely to be telling the truth, so add three marks.
6. Get that phonebook, close your eyes, and randomly pick a page. Don’t read the rest of the instructions yet! Do it now! Okay, what page did you pick? If it’s page 666 then you are likely to be possessed by demons, so place a mark on your tally.
7. When was the last time you saw a goat? If it has been over four days, go on to the next question. Otherwise, how frequently do you see these creatures? If you see a goat at least twice a week, add a mark to your tally.
8. Do you keep a goat as a pet? If you answered yes, your decision to keep a pet goat may have been influenced by demons, so add another mark.
9. Do you still have that phonebook? Randomly find a page and point to a name (keep your finger on it because you will need it again for number ten). What is this person’s name? If it contains a word similar to something that relates to Satan, death, or destruction (such as “Gunn,” “Deville,” or “Morgue,” then add one mark to your tally. If it contains the word “Lucifer,” add two more marks.
10. Okay, this test may seem a little odd but it’s a surefire sign of demonry. Whatever name you picked for number nine, even if it is something like “Daisy Love” write down the phone number. Either subtract or add the last digit by five, whichever operation keeps it at a positive number of one digit (A digit of 8 would turn into 3, a digit of 1 would turn into 6, and so on). Did you do it? Okay. Now, go to the telephone and dial the number with the altered last digit. (For clarity, 634-1325 would turn into 634-1320, 543-0926 would turn into 543-0921.) If a man (or woman for that matter) with an incredibly deep voice answers, then it’s likely that you are possessed by demons, so add a mark to your tally. If you reached the police station, then do not worry! Just say “Oops!” and hang up.
11. Do you have a picture of Adolph Hitler in your wallet or purse? It does not matter the reason. If you answered yes, add a mark to your tally.
12. On that sheet of paper, draw what you think Satan looks like. Are you doing it? Good. If that picture is a pleasant figure such as a Care Bear or Teletubby then you could be possessed by demons. Add a mark.
13. Look closer at your drawing. Is your version of Satan moving? If he/she/it is, then you are likely to be possessed by demons so add a mark to your tally. If he/she/it is constantly winking at you, then add two more marks to your tally.
14. If an obscure word like “manumit,” “dilettante” or “zetetic” has suddenly and unintentionally popped into your vocabulary within the past five years, then add another mark to your tally.
15. How many times have you seen either of these films: “Bedazzled,” “The Village of the Damned,” “Damn Yankees,” “Child’s Play” & sequels, “The End of Days,” or “The Devil’s Advocate?” If you have seen either one of these films over 20 times, then add a mark.
16. Have you ever rented either of these films by accident? If you answered yes, then add another mark to your tally.
17. Look at your wardrobe. If every single piece of clothing is red and/or black (including your undergarments), then there is a good chance you are possessed by demons, so add a mark to your tally.
18. All right, this one is going to seem very strange, but here it goes. Is your name Steve? If it is, skip this step and go on to the next. But if your name isn’t Steve, has anyone ever approached you and asked: “Are you Steve?” When you answered no, did he proceed trying to sell you automobile insurance? If you answered yes, then add a mark to your tally. (He would have said nothing and walked away if you said you were Steve.)
19. Do you or have you ever had any sort of artificial part (i.e. artificial hip, steel plate, etc.) attached to the inside of your body (dental work not included)? If you answered yes, did it ever mysteriously disappear? If it has, then give yourself a mark.
20. Okay, I am now going to ask a question and you are going to write down the first answer that comes to mind (even if it is not accurate). Do not spend time thinking about it, just write! Okay here’s the question: Who is Martin Luther? Are you writing? Good. If you answered something like “The bad guy from Superman” then give yourself a mark.
21. I’m going to ask you another question that you must answer similar to the previous one. Do not think about it at all! Just write the first thing that comes to mind. What is your favorite fruit? Did you write it? Good job! If you answered “Tomato” or “Liberace” then you’re okay, proceed to the next step. If you answered something else, look up whatever you wrote down in the dictionary and check to make sure that it’s an actual fruit. If it is, then see if the dictionary says anything about it being extinct. If what you wrote down is either not an actual fruit or is extinct, then give yourself a mark.
22. Have you ever seen a grouping of five or more albino creatures (not including humans) with red eyes (i.e., albino sheep, albino mice, etc.)? If you answered yes, then were they all staring at you? If they were, then give yourself another mark.
23. Are you constantly seeing the cleaning lady with the pink outfit? (If you fall into this category, you’ll know what I’m talking about). If you do, then give yourself another point.
24. Do you hear voices in your head? If you answered no, then proceed to the next number. Are these voices telling you to kill somebody? If you answered yes, you’re okay. If they are telling you something else, then give yourself another mark.
25. Have you ever fallen asleep on Halloween day at approximately 5:00 p.m. - 6:00 p.m. and didn’t wake up until dawn? If you answered yes, then there is a good chance that you are possessed by demons so give yourself another mark.
26. Has someone or something ever knocked you unconscious on Halloween night. (Night, mind you.) If so, then give yourself another mark.
27. Have you ever been frisked by a priest? If you have, then give yourself a mark.
28. Do you like ketchup and cottage cheese and/or have eaten that meal more than three times? If you answered yes, then give yourself a mark.
29. Do you know how one of your great-great-great-great-great grandfathers or one of your great-great-great-great-great grandmothers looked like? (The ancestor mentioned here can be greater.) If you answered no, then proceed to the next step. Are you being constantly reminded of his or her image? If so, then give yourself another point.
30. Do you remember exactly what you were doing on April 28, 1993 at 12:59 p.m. Eastern Standard Time? If you do, then add another mark to your tally.
31. Have you recently acquired a birthmark that resembles anything religious (such as a chapel, or a grail)? If you answered yes, then add a point.
32. Do you normally sleep in a room with somebody else? If you answered no, then proceed to the next step. Does this person complain about you talking in your sleep? If so, ask them what you normally talk about. If your themes are consistent and eerie in nature, add a point.
33. Do you have a six-inch long goatee? If you answered yes, then add a point.
34. Does either your husband, wife, boyfriend, or girlfriend have a six-inch long goatee? If you answered yes, then did he or she acquire this feature after you two had begun dating? If so, add a point.
35. Have you ever been visited by a Jehovah’s Witness wearing sunglasses? If so, add another point.
36. Have you ever known a zombie? If no, then proceed to the next step. What is the zombie’s middle name? If you know the answer to this question, then give yourself a point.
37. Do you have an uncontrollable urge to visit the island of Bermuda? (I’m not talking about an incredible urge to visit a tropical paradise. It must be the island of Bermuda and ONLY the island of Bermuda.) If you answered yes then give yourself another point.
38. Are you constantly trying to mold something out of mashed potatoes, mud, clay, silly putty, or anything with that sort of consistency? If so, then do you know what it is? If you know what it is, then you’re okay and you may proceed to the next number. If you do not, however, then go onto the internet or to the library and find a picture of Devil’s Tower. Is this what you have been sculpting? If you answered yes, then I think I just cured you. However, if you are molding something different, then add a mark to your tally.
39. Okay, get that sheet of paper and quickly write down five random letters. Don’t read this sentence first! Write the words! Good. If four of the five letters contain either “A, N, S, T” or three of the five letters contain “E, L, H” then add a point.
40. Look at the clock on your VCR. If it’s either set to the correct time or blinking 12:00, then you are okay. However, if it’s over three hours off or is blinking something other than 12:00 then add a point.
41. How often do you have dreams about elves? If you don’t dream about elves too often, then proceed to the next number. Do these elves either have blue, green, or human-colored skin? If you answered no, then give yourself another point.
42. Do you believe in the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, and the Tooth Fairy? Yes or no. Decide now. If you answered yes (even as a joke) then add another point.
43. Are you a diehard Garth Brooks fan? If not, then you may proceed to the next number. Are you also a diehard Salieri fan? If you answered yes then add a point.
44. Are you able to read English? If not, add a point.
45. How many times have you heard this joke: “Have you heard about the new corduroy pillow? Yes, they made headlines!” If it has been well over thirty times within the past week, then add another point.
46. Are different people around you constantly whistling tunes from “The Sound of Music?” (If you haven’t seen that film, then I suggest watching it just to make sure.) If they are, then give yourself another point.
47. Are you constantly seeing bathroom graffiti in public restrooms mentioning something about the end of the world? If yes, add a tally mark. If that bathroom graffiti usually contains your first name, then add two more tally marks.
48. Do your jaws click? If not, then proceed to the next question. If they do click, has your dentist ever mentioned them clicking in Morse Code? If yes, write another mark on your tally.
49. Have you ever taken or had the urge to take a college class entitled “quantum physics?” If not, proceed to the next number. If you have had the urge to take this college class, do you know what “quantum physics” is? If you don’t, then give yourself a point.
50. Does the style of your penmanship change constantly? If yes, then add another point.
51. Did anything bizarre occur while you were taking this test? A bizarre occurrence may have been inspired by demons who did not want you to find out of your possession so add another point.
All right! You made it! You are finished with all fifty-one questions! Okay here goes the scale:
0-5 Congratulations! You have nothing to worry about. The few, if any, tally marks were mere coincidences.
6-10 This is not an ideal score, but you are overall fine. If I were you, I would print off this questionnaire and keep it with you, so you can watch for the other signs.
11-15 This is basically the middle ground. Either you are possessed by one demon or multiple weak-demons, or you have happened to coincide with some of these incidents. If you do drugs, then you are probably not demon-possessed because some of these symptoms are commonplace. If you do not do drugs, then watch for the other signs.
16-25 You are possessed by demons. These ones won’t do much harm to you considering. If one of them starts talking to you, obey them and you will live.
26-30 You are likely to have fifteen to twenty demons inside you. Fortunately, most of them are passive, but sometimes a fight may break out.
31-35 To get a score as high as this, there can be up to fifty demons inside of you. They are certainly not passive, but they seem to get along all right most days.
36-40 Umm… this is NOT good. I think you made one of them angry.
41-45 Congratulations! You’ve made it to the one-tenth percentile of all demon-possessed individuals! I have never actually talked with one of you, but theoretically, there are up to one thousand demons inside of you. An astrologist once told me that a possession-rate this high means that they are most likely to be preparing for some type of celestial war. Hey buddy, good luck!
46-58 You are likely to be clinically dead or spouting out vomit right now. If you are not, then you lied on this questionnaire.
60-59 Dude, you’re screwed. There were only fifty-eight marks possible.
666- If you count six hundred and sixty-six tally marks, you are most likely to be possessed by Satan himself or one of his princes. In this case, it’s important for you to know that suicide is not the answer.
COME AND GET ME MICHAEL LAWERENCE JUST TRY IT! WHAT ‘POWER’ DO YOU HAVE!!!
Daniel: backme: okie dokieDaniel: i like those words
me: do you like the words “blow job”
me: nah kidding
Daniel: i bet u like it
me: i bet u like it more
Daniel: we should test it
me: yeah totally
Daniel: i aint joking
me: what u trying to say now? lol
Daniel: do u really want me to say. coz i think u no what im trying to say
me: sayy it XDD
me: now who’s the shy 1
Daniel: give me head bitch lol ( ur not a bitch )
me: loool now thats more like it XDD
Daniel: if we were saying this face to face nd i was at ur house . i wouldnt just be saying it
Daniel: thats ur tongue nd lips around ma dick
me: dirty boy
me: but i like it
Daniel: ur so kinky
me: u made me!
Daniel: u made me
Daniel: but u would give me head though
Daniel: thats a yes
Daniel: depends if ur horny ?
me: nah depends if u let me lol
Daniel: there wont be a problem with that then
me: XD ur kinky too
Daniel: i no
Daniel: if u wanna give me head , i aint gonna say no
me: that would be in a long time i cant even speak to u can i >.
Daniel: how will u be able to speak to me when my dick is in ur mouth
Daniel: its true though
me: i bet i’ll have weird dreams thnx to u lol
Daniel: wat kinda dreams
me: dirty ones hehe
Daniel: hehe . u kinky
me: i like it when ur dirty XDD
Daniel: same here XD
me: anyways i better go now
Daniel: did ur dad tell u to
me if he didn’t i’d still be here lol
me: sweet dreams
Daniel: i would say u to but u said ur gonna have naughty 1ns
me: bye x
Have you ever lied for truth in Truth or Dare?
If you only had 1 day to live, what would you do?
Name one person in the room you would least like to be stuck with on a desert island. Why?
If you could make one person in the room your slave for a day who would it be?
What is the meanest thing you’ve ever done?
Have you ever cheated to win a game?Who was your first kiss? (if not, on the cheek at least?)
How far have you been with a girl/boy?
What was your most embarrassing moment?
What is one annoying habit of each person in the room?
Have you ever lied to a teacher and what was it about?
If you were on a deserted island what two people would you bring and why?
Do you sleep with a teddy?
What are you going to name your kids when you get married? How many?
Who was the last note that you got from and what did it say? Read it aloud.
Have you ever gotten caught passing notes in class? Did the teacher read it out loud?
Have you ever held hands with a boy?
What’s the dumbest thing you ever said or did around a boy you liked?
If your friends could change one thing about you what do you think it would be?
If you had to go down the street to the end of the block at midnight would you have to take a friend or could you do it by yourself?
What are 3 things about you that no one in the room knows?
Have you ever started a rumour about someone? What was it?
Amongst all the individuals in this room, which girl/boy would you like to date?
If you woke up one day and notice that you are invisible, then what will be the first thing that you would like to do?
Who do you fancy and who do you LOVE?
Have you ever secretly watched someone undress?
There was a giant explosion. You and 2 other people of the opposite sex survived. Who would you want them to be, and why?
What quality about the person sitting to your right or left do you dislike or like the most?
Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?
What is the most embarrassing nick name that anyone has ever called you?
Who do you think has the best hair in the room?
Which person in the room do you think is most likely to flirt with themselves in the mirror?
What is the most embarrassing thing your parents have seen you do?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how good looking would you rate yourself?
If you had 2 wishes, that would expire after 24 hours, what would they be?
Who is most beautiful person you know?
What’s the “dirtiest” thing you’ve ever done or thought about?
If you had to marry someone tomorrow who would you pick and why?
If you could read people’s minds, what would you want to know?
What is the first thing you notice when you meet a person of the opposite gender?
When was the last time you cried?
Who do you think is the best looking person in the room?
Would you have sex with anyone in this room? Who?
Who would you have sex with?
What was the meanest rumour ever spread about you?
Have you ever day dreamed about anyone in this room?
What is your favourite thing to lick?
Have you ever reached for someone’s Bum (and actually got there)?
If you could only be with one person from now on who would it be, why? (or someone in the room)
If you met Jesus face to face what would you want to say to him?
If your house was burning what 4 things would you grab?
Talk about one of your bad habits.
French Toast Recipe
You will need:
Sugar I used 8 teaspoons, but change according to taste
1 teacup of Milk
Bread - As many slices to use up the mixture
1) Firstly crack the eggs into the bowl and add some sugar.
2) I advise you to wash your hands now
3) Start to whisk the mixture until it looks creamy and a pale yellow colour.
4) Now add the milk.
5) Keep on whisking until its all mixed in.
6) Now get your bread and soak it in the mixture you can use a spatula or your hands to get it out, if you do use your hands then wash your hands before you eat as you are handling raw egg.
7) Pour some oil into the pan and swirl it around and place your bread in the frying pan.
Keep turning the bread over and fry until its slightly golden.
9) I prefer my French Toast plain, but you can try yours with honey, fresh fruit or whipped cream.
10) Tuck in!
You will need:
6 tablespoons (3/4 sticks) unsalted butter, at room temperature
3/4 cups sugar
2 extra-large eggs, at room temperature
¾ tsp vanilla extract
½ cup sour cream
1/8 cup milk
1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 tsp baking powder
¼ tsp baking soda
¼ tsp kosher salt
½ pint (1 cup) fresh blueberries
Preheat the oven to 350F. Prepare an 8-inch x 2 inch round baking pan by greasing it and dusting it with flour.
In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, cream the butter and sugar until light and fluffy, about 5 minutes. With the mixer on low speed, add the eggs 1 at a time, then add the vanilla, sour cream, and milk.
In a separate bowl, sift together the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. With the mixer on low speed add the flour mixture to the batter and beat until just mixed. Fold in the blueberries with a spatula and be sure the batter is completely mixed.
Transfer batter to prepared pan. Bake for 30 mins until a cake tester comes out clean. Cool in pan for 10 minutes, then turn onto a rack to cool completely.
You will need:
1¼ cups Plain flour
¼ tsp Salt
1/3 cup Butter/Margarine, cold
4 to 5 tbsp Cold Water
Small tart pans
Round cookie cutter
1/3 cup jam or lemon curd (any flavour jam you like!)
Combine the flour and salt in a medium bowl. Cut the butter or margarine into small cubes and add to the flour. Using a pastry cutter or a fork, combine butter into flour mixture till it resembles coarse bread crumbs. Sprinkle a tablespoon of cold water and combine with a fork. Slowly add a tablespoon of water at a time till the mixture is moist and comes together. Shape into a ball and transfer to a lightly floured surface.
Roll the dough to a thickness of ¼ inch. Cut dough using cookie cutter and line the tart pans with a circle each, pressing gently with your fingertips to help the dough line the ridges of the pan. Prick dough with a fork on the base and sides, line with foil, place on a baking sheet and bake for 6-7 minutes. Remove the foil and continue baking for 4 more minutes.
Fill tart pans with a teaspoon of jam/curd each. Try not to over fill the tarts as once the jam/curd starts to bubble in the oven it will become runny and start to spill over the pastry, leaving the tarts looking messy.
It happened to me, so dont let it happen to you! even the best cooks make mistakes XD
Bake for 10 minutes.
Cool tarts on wire racks completely before unmolding from pans.
3 cups Whole milk
2 tbsp Vanilla custard powder (Brand: Brown & Polson)
2 cups Sweetened condensed milk
1 Cup Mango Puree
2 Cups Double cream
½ tsp Clear vanilla extract
¼ tsp Orange Red colour (powder preferably)
Hand-held electric beater, the one which can withstand heavy whipping.
Make a smooth paste of the custard powder and ¼ cup of milk. Bring remaining milk to a boil in a heavy saucepan. Add sugar and stir to dissolve. When the milk comes to a rolling boil, reduce heat and slowly stir in the custard mixture. Keep stirring till the milk thickens. The custard is ready when it coats the back of a spoon. Remove from heat and let cool completely.
While the custard is cooling, take a large bowl (which will fit into your freezer) and blend the mango puree with the condensed milk. Stir well to combine. Once the custard has cooled, add it to the puree-condensed milk mixture. Also add the double cream, the vanilla extract and food colour.
Cover and freeze for an hour.
What follows next is the important step…the ‘churning’ or whipping part. Since this ice-cream is made without an ice-cream maker, doing it right manually determines the final quality of the resulting ice-cream.
Remove bowl from freezer and using a hand beater, whip the mixture for 10 minutes at the highest speed on your beater. The mixture will begin to bubble because of the whipped cream. Return to freezer for another 30 minutes.
Repeat the whipping process, but reduce time to 5 minutes. Return to freezer for 30 minutes.
This needs to be done 2 more times(once every 30 mins). By the third time your mixture would have thickened and would be harder to ‘churn’. Let your hand-mixer do its thing.
After the last churn, you can transfer ice-cream to containers and then freeze or return the same bowl to the freezer. Freeze overnight or for atleast 6 hours.
You will need:
Butter, for greasing the pans
1 3/4 cups plain flour, plus more for pans
2 cups sugar
3/4 cups good unsweetened cocoa powder
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup buttermilk, shaken
1/2 cup vegetable oil
2 extra-large eggs, at room temperature
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
1 cup freshly brewed coffee, at room temp
Chocolate frosting (recipe follows)
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Butter 2 (8-inch) round cake pans. Line with parchment paper, then butter and flour the pans.
Sift the flour, sugar, cocoa, baking soda, baking powder, and salt into a bowl. Use an electric beater on low speed to combine the dry ingredients. In another bowl, combine the buttermilk, oil, eggs, and vanilla. With the mixer on low speed, slowly add the wet ingredients to the dry. With mixer still on low, add the coffee and stir just to combine, scraping the bottom of the bowl with a rubber spatula. Pour the batter into the prepared pans and bake for 35 to 40 minutes, until a cake tester comes out clean. Cool in the pans for 30 minutes, then turn them out onto a cooling rack and cool completely.
Chocolate frosting (icing)
Since the chocolate cake itself is very rich and strong tasting I wanted to make a light frosting that tasted chocolatey but not too sweet.
You will need:
1 cup Double cream
½ cup Icing sugar
3-4 tbsp Cocoa powder
Sift the sugar and cocoa separately and keep aside. Pre-chill the bowl and the beaters before whipping the cream. Whip cream on low speed for 3-4 minutes only till its thick. Do NOT over beat, it turns to butter…you don’t want that! While whipping the cream halfway add the sugar and cocoa powder slowly. The final result should be a smooth spreadable mixture. It should not be in a liquid state. Taste frosting for sweetness and add more Sugar if required. For a darker richer colour, use more cocoa powder.
Place 1 layer, flat side up, on a flat plate or cake pedestal. With a knife or offset spatula, spread the top with frosting. Place the second layer on top, rounded side up, and spread the frosting evenly on the top and sides of the cake.
Some people dont have a steady hand, I do but for some people it might be hard to write across a cake so I drizzled Chocolate sauce (recipe below) and grated dark chocolate on top. It’s totally up to you how you decorate it.
3 tbsp Dark chocolate chips
1 tbsp Double cream
1 tbsp Water
In a microwave safe bowl place the chocolate chips and heat on HIGH for 25-30 seconds. Stir once halfway and keep a close watch because it doesn’t take long to melt. Let cool a little and then fold in the cream and water and stir to make a thin sauce. Add more water if required
You will need:
For the Cake: (Makes two 9” size cakes)
2 cups Plain flour
1 ¾ Cups Icing sugar (Powdered Sugar)
2 tsp Baking powder
2 tbsp Cocoa powder
1 tsp Vanilla Extract
For the Filling:
1 cup Double Cream
½ cup Icing sugar
Glace Cherries (or canned cherries,drained)
For the syrup:
1 tbsp lime juice
½ tbsp Sugar
½ cup Water
Preheat oven to 300F.
Separate the white from the yolks. Beat each separately adding vanilla extract and little sugar at a time to make a stiff froth. Fold yellow into white. Sift flour, cocoa powder and baking powder thrice and fold into the egg mixture.
FOLD: Means to slowly turn dry ingredients into the wet in a circular inward to outward motion. Do not beat or mix vigorously. The main purpose of folding is to allow more air into the mixture and also to avoid flattening the frothy eggs.
Pour mixture into two greased 9” pans. This makes a thin cake, if you want it thicker then use 8” pans. Bake for 30-35 minutes till cake is done and springs back on touching or a cake tester comes out clean when inserted in the centre of the cake.
Let cool in pan for 10 minutes and then on the cooling rack.
Chill the electric beater blades and the bowl in which you will use to whip the cream. Whip cream while slowly adding sugar to a spreadable consistency. Do not overbeat, it turns to butter!
Mix lime juice, sugar and water in a bowl. Stir till sugar dissolves. Place one cake over a cake pedestal or plate, poke holes with a fork in a few places on the cake. Pour the syrup all over the cake in a spoon, till cake is moist (but not soggy). Spread an even layer of the cream, and place cut cherries. Place the other cake on top of this and repeat the moistening procedure. Again spread a even thick layer of cream, decorate with cherries and grated dark chocolate.
Chill before serving and refrigerate remaining cake (if there’s any left!)
If your using a American cookbook the following information will be helpful, since many of the common cooking ingredients are called by different names:
Plain flour All-purpose flour
Strong flour Bread flour
Single cream Light cream
Double cream Whipping cream
Caster sugar Granulated Sugar (10X)
Demerara sugar Brown Sugar
Treacle sugar Molasses
Dark chocolate Semi-sweet chocolate
You will need: (Yields about 60 cookies)
½ cup Vegetable Shortening
½ cup unsalted Butter, at room temp
1 cup packed light brown sugar
½ cup white sugar
½ tsp Baking soda
1 tsp Vanilla extract
2 ½ cups Plain flour
4 oz Milk chocolate chips
4 oz White chocolate chips
4 oz Dark chocolate mini chips
Preheat oven to 375F. Line two large baking sheets with parchment paper. Set aside.
Beat the shortening and butter using a stand up mixer or a hand-held electric beater till smooth and well blended. Add the brown sugar, white sugar and baking soda. Beat until combined; then add the eggs and vanilla. Beat in as much of the flour as you can with the mixer. Stir in the remaining flour using a wooden spoon. Add the chocolate chips and give one last stir to combine. Using a teaspoon, drop rounded mounds of the dough on prepared baking sheets spacing them 2 inches apart.
Tres Leche or “three milk” cake is a Mexican dessert. A spongy cake, soaked in three types of milk and topped with lots of Double cream and fresh fruit, this is the ultimate dessert to beat the summer heat. Its good for any occasion and will surely have your family and friends clambering for seconds
You will need:
For the Cake:
6 large eggs, separated
1 1/2 cups Sugar
2 cups Plain flour (Maida)
2 tsp Baking powder
1/2 cup whole milk
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 (14 oz) can evaporated milk
1 (14-oz) can sweetened condensed milk
1 cup Whole Milk
1 (12oz) tub Cool double or 1 cup Double cream
Fresh fruit – mangoes/pineapple/strawberries
To make the cake: Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Lightly grease and flour a 9 by 13-inch baking dish and set aside.
In the bowl of a mixer, beat the egg whites on low speed until soft peaks form. Add the sugar gradually with the mixer running and till stiff peaks are formed. Add the egg yolks 1 at a time, beating well after the addition of each.
Sift together the flour and baking powder and add to the egg mixture, alternating with the milk. (Do this quickly so the batter does not lose volume.) Add the vanilla. Bake until golden, 25 minutes.
To make the cream topping: In a blender, combine the evaporated milk, condensed milk, and milk, blend on high speed.
Remove the cake from the oven and while still warm, pour the cream mixture over it. Let sit and cool to room temperature. Cover and refrigerate until well chilled, at least 4 hours or overnight.
To assemble: Remove the cake from the refrigerator and spread the cool whip evenly across the top. Arrange the cut fresh fruit (whatever you are using) and serve. If you are using Double cream, beat the cream till it forms peaks and then spread it over the cake. Refrigerate for an hour or two so that the topping can set and then serve.
Pastry is a term used in India to refer to any cake made with a fresh cream filling or frosting. The most popular ones are the Black Forest and Pineapple pastries.
2 cups Plain flour plus more for pans
1 ¾ Cups Icing sugar
2 tsp Baking powder
1 tsp Pineapple Extract (or Vanilla) For the Filling and Frosting:1 ½ cups Heavy Double Cream
½ cup Icing sugar
1 Cup Pineapple chunksFor the syrup:1 tsp lemon juice
1 tbsp Icing sugar
½ to ¾ cup Ice-cold water
Preheat oven to 300F. Prepare the baking pans. For this cake you will need two 9-inch round baking pans. This step is very important for easy removal of the baked cakes. Since this cake has no fat in it, ie no butter, the chances of it sticking to the pan are more if pans are not prepared well. Grease the insides of the pan evenly with butter or solid vegetable shortening using a pastry brush. Sprinkle each of the pans with 1 tbsp of plain flour. Tap pans gently on the kitchen counter to ensure the flour spreads and covers the pan. Remove the excess flour. Set pans aside till ready to use.
Separate the white from the yolks. Beat each separately adding pineapple extract and little sugar at a time. The whites should form stiff peaks and the yolks should be pale and thick. Fold the beaten yolks into whites. Sift flour and baking powder thrice and fold into the egg mixture.
FOLD: Means to slowly turn dry ingredients into the wet in a circular inward to outward motion. Do not beat or mix vigorously. The main purpose of folding is to allow more air into the mixture and to avoid flattening the frothy eggs.
Pour mixture into prepared pans. Bake for 15-20 minutes till cake is done and springs back on touch or a cake tester (or toothpick) comes out clean when inserted in the centre of the cake.
Let cool in pan for 10 minutes and then invert cakes onto cooling rack. Let cool completely before frosting.
Chill the beater blades and the bowl in which you will use to whip the cream. Whip cream while slowly adding sugar till cream is thick and stiff. Do not overbeat, it turns to butter!
Mix lemon juice, sugar and water in a bowl. Place one cake over a cake pedestal or plate, poke holes with a fork in a few places on the cake. Spoon the syrup all over the cake in a till cake is moist (but not soggy). Spread an even layer of the cream, and place pineapple chunks and sliced glace cherries. Place the other cake on top of this and repeat the moistening procedure. Spread an even thick layer of cream on top. To finish decorate with remaining pineapple chunks and cherries.
You will need:
8 (1 oz) chocolate squares
2 1/2 cups milk
1 cup butter, softened
3 large eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 2/3 cups plain flour
2 cups of sugar
1 1/4 teaspoons baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
Chocolate Truffle Filling:
1 oz Dark Chocolate squares, coarsely chopped
1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons double cream
1 to 2 (oz Dark Chocolate squares, finely grated
Stir together the 8oz chocolate squares, milk and butter in a large heavy saucepan over low heat, and cook, stirring constantly, 8 to 10 minutes or until chocolate melts and mixture is smooth. Remove from heat, and let mixture cool slightly (about 10 minutes).
Whisk together eggs and vanilla in a large bowl. Gradually whisk in melted chocolate mixture until blended and smooth.
Combine flour, sugar, soda and salt; whisk into chocolate mixture until blended and smooth.
Pour batter into 3 greased and floured 9-inch round cake pans. (I used an 8″ square pan which made two layers)
Bake at 325° for 25 to 30 minutes or until a wooden pick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool cake layers in pans on wire racks 10 minutes. Remove from pans, and let cool completely on wire racks.
Microwave coarsely chopped darkchocolate squares and cream in a 2-quart microwave-safe bowl at HIGH 1 1/2 to 2 minutes, stirring after 1 minute and then every 30 seconds until chocolate melts and mixture is smooth and slightly thickened. Let cool slightly (about 15 minutes).
Spread 1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons Chocolate Truffle Filling evenly on top of 1 cake layer. Top with 1 cake layer; spread 1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons Chocolate Truffle Filling evenly on top, reserving remaining 1/2 cup Chocolate Truffle Filling. Top with remaining cake layer.
Spread warm dark chocolate mixture over top and sides of cake. Chill cake 30 minutes or until chocolate glaze is firm. You can press a metal spatula against the still warm glaze to create a rippling effect. Sprinkle grated dark chocolate evenly over top of cake and serve.
Enjoy the chocolatey goodness!
A crepe is a type of very thin pancake.
For the crepes:
2 large eggs
1 cup whole milk
1 cup plain flour
A pinch of salt
2 tbsp butter
For the filling:
3 tbsp butter
2 lemons, juiced
1 tbsp brown sugar
1/4 cup tangerine juice
½ cup Raspberries fresh/frozen
½ cup Strawberries fresh/frozen
1 small jar hazelnut spread (recommended: Nutella)
Icing sugar, for serving
In a bowl, whisk together the eggs and milk. In a separate bowl mix the flour and salt. In a small pan over low heat melt the butter and cook it until it is light brown.
Add the egg and milk mix to the flour and salt and mix well so that there are no large clumps. Add the browned butter and mix to incorporate, being careful not to overmix batter. The batter should just coat the back of a spoon. If seems too thick, thin it out with a little more milk or water. Let the batter rest for 1 hour prior to making crepes.
Peel bananas, cut into big bits.In a large pan melt the butter and cook until lightly browned, add the lemon juice and sugar, stirring so that the sugar dissolves. Add the bananas and tangerine juice and cook for about 3 to 5 minutes so the flavors incorporate and the bananas are hot but not mushy. Add the raspberries and strawberries. Stir gently to combine. Set this mixture aside and let cool slightly.
After the crepe batter has rested for 1 hour, heat 1 (10-inch) nonstick saute pan over medium heat. Add 2 ounces of the crepe batter to the pan, remove pan from heat and tilt slightly to spread the batter over the entire pan.
Cook for about 1 minute until the bottom side is lightly browned. With your fingertips and a spatula, carefully flip crepe and cook the second side for about 15 seconds. Remove crepes and continue with remaining batter.
Lay the crepes out on a flat surface. Spread each crepe with about 1 tablespoon of hazelnut spread.
In one fourth of the crepe, spoon about 2 tablespoons of the banana mixture and fold the crepe over in half and in half again so that it has a triangular shape. Repeat this with all of the crepes.
Serve the crepes on a plate with the sauce spooned over the top and sprinkled with the icing sugar.
These crepes are very light and make a great dessert for any occasion. They are easy to make and are surely good eats with all that fruit!