• February 2021
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Tacky Attack

by sailor_venus:hellokitty.com

I’m sure most of us have heard of the infamous Hello Kitty wedding and prom dresses. I have difficulty purging them from my memory. I can’t honestly fathom that an individual conceived of these garments, and then took time, out of their LIFE, to create them. It’s not to say that the dresses are poorly made (mind you the blue gown looks like something a teenager made in home-ec class), they’re just so outrageously hideous and tacky that anyone who would wear them clearly has a lack of taste and style. Sure I was smitten by the idea of sporting a Hello Kitty dress once myself, when I was a child. There’s no excuse for a grown woman to degrade herself in such a way, especially on her wedding day. First, let us examine the aforementioned dresses.

Hello Kitty Wedding Dress

Hello Kitty Wedding Dresses

Hello Kitty Wedding Dress - Red

Goodness, it hurts my eyes just to gaze upon them. Look at the first one! If you remove the Hello Kitty heads, it’s a horrible, ugly dress. It’s about as trashy as trashy can be. If the dress itself is that disgustingly awful, then whether you stick Hello Kitty on it or not, it’s still going to suck. It looks like a reject Cinderella dress, with too much organza, and puckering in the bodice. There’s also no rhyme or reason to the placement of the plush heads; they look like they’ve been slapped on there with a hope and a prayer. This dress is the worst offender of the bunch, which is why I’ve posted it first. It’s the epitome of wrong, and my heart goes out to the girl who wore it, because in a few years time she’s going to look back and say “what was I thinking?”

The second dress, which is pink, appears to be favored by many. I can’t help but get the feeling that it’s the overwhelming infatuation with Hello Kitty and Hello Kitty Pink that inhibits the ability to distinguish garish from glamour. This is another dress that features Hello Kitty appliques, and if you remove them underneath lies an ugly dress! Does the fact it features Hello Kitty’s face somehow make buying this ugly dress justifiable?! I say NO!

The third dress is pretty awful as well, in terms of design, and material. It’s not poorly constructed, it’s also not well constructed. The overall design of the garment is a little dated. It looks like a floor length square dancing outfit. The material is what really bothers me about this dress, it looks like it’s been made from a bed sheet. It appears to be the thinnest, cheapest cotton; you can tell by the way it hangs limply and that it has distinct wrinkles running through the skirt. In Gone With the Wind, Scarlett makes a dress from her mother’s drapery; in real life, a woman makes a Hello Kitty dress from toddler’s bedding. Lord have mercy.

The final dress that I’ve included I happen to have a pure bias towards. I hate velvet, velour, or anything that emulates it. It just comes across as incredibly cheap to me. I know for a fact that this material is actually expensive, it just doesn’t look it. Surprisingly, this particular dress wouldn’t be so bad if the appliques were removed; which I wish they were because they are pretty horrendous. The Hello Kitty appliques are red, which I hate any coloured version of Hello Kitty - she’s a white bob-tailed cat! Let’s leave her that way. I also can’t stand the floral detailing, with those cheap little ribbon roses, and the mish mash of pink, white and green. It looks like someone took a three year old’s Christmas party dress and super-sized it. The only construction issue I can perceive occurs at the bottom of the dress, where it appears they attempted to ruffle the material, but failed to do so (largely because this type of material is thick).

If I’ve offended you, and I hope I did, it serves as a reality check. These dresses are not attractive in the least, and they’re also not worth spending a ton of money on. If you wish to incorporate Hello Kitty into your dress for your wedding, or prom, or formal event; you can do that without degrading yourself. The best way to look elegant AND have Hello Kitty, is through jewelry. Good, quality jewelry. This way you don’t have to sacrifice the opportunity to have a beautiful dress, and you can have some fantastic HK jewelry that you can wear again and again. It’s win/win.

Hello Kitty Jewelry

Hello Kitty Christmas Products Review

by sailor_venus:hellokitty.com

Christmas is quickly approaching; it’s the most anxiety inducing time of the year! I promised I’d begin my Christmas shopping early, but I have more important obligations to see through. I’ve also been morbidly ill and I do my best to avoid contact with the public in such circumstances. Just because I’m housebound, however, does not mean that I cannot shop. I’ve been perusing the online catalogues, and I have seen some great gift ideas. I’ve also seen some awful ones…

I believe it’s safe to assume that nearly anything that boasts Hello Kitty’s likeness is sure to attract the interest of an adoring fan. The blank stare, the lack of a mouth, the red bow, the head that looks like a marshmallow (I believe she would smell of marshmallows if she really existed); she exudes cuteness! Unfortunately, her overwhelming adorability can be used in abstraction, to parade weak and poorly designed products as something desirable. I’m sure any die-hard Hello Kitty fan has heard the horrors of the Hello Kitty humidifier; the one that sets childrens’ rooms aflame. Yeah, that’s super. I’m the proud owner of the Hello Kitty cupcake maker, which compresses the cakes into smooshed patties that look nothing as the photograph on the box depicts them. The product is also accompanied by a recipe booklet containing recipes for food that is inedible, as most of which contains a third of oil. It looks really cute, on the shelf. If you haven’t guessed already, my blog entry is about a Christmas product review. Now the following products are not new to the market, in fact they were introduced last year, which surprises me because I felt the majority weren’t worth bringing back.

Let’s get this party started….


TOP LEFT - Hello Kitty Stocking (in Christmas Red and Kitty Pink) - ($12.99 CAD)
The pink stocking is apart of my Christmas collection. You can probably guess I’m at least satisfied with the product, considering I own it, and yes I did purchase it. I’m happy to give it maybe three stars out of five, because it does its job. Is it a good product? Not so much. I had to go through five stockings before I settled on buying one; all the stockings had noticeable printed flaws. The ink splattered during the print, as a result many of the stockings looked dirty, and on one of them Hello Kitty’s eye was smeared. You would think the manufacturers would want to send out the best product they possibly could, but these stockings looked like rejects that should have been shipped to a discount outlet. The price was $12.99 CAD last year, and it remains the same. It’s not an atrocious price, but it’s not fantastic given the quality. The print is obviously an issue, but the way it’s constructed and the materials are also not fantastic either. Many of the stockings were assembled too tightly, making them appear bulgy, and the material is that nasty fabric used to create prizes for county fairs. The price does not reflect quality. I actually paid way less for the stocking because I happened to cash in on a free gift card with purchase. I would not have paid the full price for this product.

TOP RIGHT & BOTTOM RIGHT - Hello Kitty Christmas Ornaments and Set - ($7-$10)
I figured I would review these two products together given that they are very similar. The large figurines are, to my recollection, $7 CAD a piece. The set of five contains ornaments that are considerably smaller, and it rings in at $10. There isn’t much to say about them; they’re PVC ornaments with the worst paint jobs you’ll ever see. Similar to the aforementioned stocking, there are issues with paint bleeding or splatter. The fact that they are PVC is also a little frustrating; the material can get dirty, and after all Hello Kitty is white. These ornaments are not, in my opinion, worth the price. If you are attracted to them, try to get them on sale.

BOTTOM LEFT - Hello Kitty 20″ Porch Greeter - ($34.99 CAD)
Not having ever owned a door greeter, I can’t honestly say much in defense of this product. I’m strictly going off of its appearance. There is the obvious cheap holdiay decor material put into her, specifically in her coat, hat, and her bow; yet the body portions of the figure aren’t nearly as bad. Her construction isn’t anything to rave about, she looks a little frumpy, especially in her face, which I’ve noticed lately occurs in almost all plush forms of her. This is another item that I would recommend getting on sale. The red dye in the Santa outfit will probably run into the white, so whatever you do, don’t get her wet.

I hope that you have found these reviews helpful. Remember that just because it is a Hello Kitty - Sanrio licensed product it does not equate quality!


by sailor_venus:hellokitty.com

This blog will contain intermittently posted entries about things that I find adorable or noteworthy. Perhaps I might even share some art - I can’t make promises that I will. I look forward to filling this blog with an un-cohesive mishmash of mindless dribble.


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