I’ve been stuck at home for the past few days due to an allergy that came with the full package of headaches, vertigo, and inflamed patches of skin, and if anybody ever tells me that it was just an allergic reaction in the future, I’ll rip him open a new one.

During my time with the dreaded condition (I can’t call it a sickness, although it kept me from going about with my usual work), I learned several things that every person with allergies should probably know, although heaven help me, it was one or two of the items on the list that actually got me in the end. So without further ado, here is the list of things that I relearned during these past few days.

1. Potential allergens are never good.

That’s a no-brainer, but let’s face it - some of the best and most enjoyable things in life are either too expensive, or bad for your health. In my case, I am allergic to everything crustacean, most prominent of these being the delectable, indescribably gastronomically sumptuous prawns and shrimp:

Mmm just lookit that forbidden meat

Just looking at that thing makes me weep glorious tears. There is nothing tastier than shrimp with mayonnaise, but as far as I’m concerned, this taste is pretty much nothing more than a memory for me. So note to self: no matter how tempting the shrimp looks like, or how hungry you are, never ever eat anything that even says shrimp flavor on the packaging.

2. MSG is never your friend.

This was never a problem, since I really don’t like the flavors inspired by MSG in the first place. Secondly, my mother’s been having problems with MSG for years, so I’ve seen just how bad too much of the spice can be for you. And thirdly, the same problems my mother’s been having, I’ve been suffering from recently. So technically, yes, I tend to avoid foods with heavy MSG flavors, although Hong Kong Style Noodles will always be a guilty pleasure.

This photo does not do the food justice

But compound MSG with shrimp, and you’ve got, at least for me, a winning recipe for disaster. No matter how good that bag of Okeji tempura crackers may be, if you’re going to end up looking like a walking example of a world map that has to suffer with massive bouts of vertigo, you are stupid for even putting your mitts into the bag in the first place.

3. Antihistamines are love

There’s no doubt in anybody’s mind that the words asthma attack usually go hand-in-hand with antihistamines, that wonderful medicine made of pure win without which a good sixty percent of today’s population would be on the verge of kicking the bucket, thanks to present-day levels of pollution. Now, technically speaking, an asthma attack is an allergic reaction, so I ended up relying on my trusty inhaler all throughout my ordeal. And cups of coffee, although that really didn’t help too much, but it’s an antihistaminic agent, so c’est la vie.

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