(Or “Ten Reasons Why Yellow Owns Black”)

Mood: Vengeful

I’m still frustrated with what Kuromi did at Keroppi’s party, so I compiled a list on why she’s not the best Sanrio character at all.

10. She doesn’t know how to stand up for what she believes in. She claims she hates Melody, but she creates her blog on the mymelody domain here at Sanrio Town. Ironic, much? At least I didn’t make mine on hellokitty, as a matter of principle. I feel a hairball coming up. *cough*Sell-out!*cough* Whoops. Sorry about that.

9. She calls me Kitty’s stunt double. Hah. Despite the humiliating offer made by Mr. Agent, we stars actually have our own stunt doubles when we’re in perilous situations. Mine is called Minnie (no relation to another rodent, of course). Kuromi does her own stunts because she’s not famous enough yet. Aaawww… Poor her. Not.

8. Why does she love pickled leeks? I shudder to even think about what that would taste. Talk about barf fest *cringe*cringe* I’ll take cookies any day. That is, if Kitty doesn’t take it first.

7. From what hole did she come from? At least I have a family of my own (never mind that I have an annoying sister). What about her? No one knows.

6. She’s a rabbit. FYI, rabbits are rodents. Three guesses on what a cat’s worst enemy is.

5. Oooh… Look at her, all tough, having a gang of her own. Kuromi’s 5? How scary. As if. Bullies are never cool.

4. She’s a friend-and-animal abuser. Why is she using a pal of hers as her personal vehicle? Tsk tsk. I’m a better friend than her. Just ask Cathy, Tippy, Tiny Chum, and the rest of our chums.

3. What is it with the jester hat? What is she trying to do? Make us laugh to death? Puh-leaze. Even making it black and putting a skull there doesn’t scare anyone. Especially if the skull is pink.

Oh wait, I get it. She’s going to give us a scare because of her horrendous outfit! Hello, fashion police? We’ve got a live one here.

2. Yellow is the new black. Her taste is so passé. She really needs to update on her wardrobe. Oh wait. She doesn’t really wear clothes. How sad.

1. Since when have rabbits become scary? What’s she going to do, wave her fluffy rabbit tail at me?