(http://blog.hellokitty.com/darkntwisty)

My favorite quotes

CATCH-22


1. Havermeyer was a lead bombardier who never missed. Yossarian was a lead bombardier who had been demoted because he no longer gave a damn whether he missed or not. He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt, and his only mission each time he went up was to come down alive.

2. Yossarian moved around in front of his desk and told Major Major that he did not want to fly any more combat missions
“Why not?” Major Major asked.
“I’m afraid.”
“That’s nothing to be ashamed of,” Major Major counseled him kindly. “We’re all afraid.”
“I’m not ashamed,” Yossarian said. “I’m just afraid.”

SEVERUS SNAPE

1. “You are here to learn the subtle science and exact art of potion making. As there is little foolish wand waving here, many of you will hardly believe it’s magic. I don’t expect you will really understand the beauty of the softly simmering cauldron with its shimmering fumes, the delicate power of liquids that creep through human veins, bewitching the mind, ensnaring the senses … I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory, even stopper death — if you aren’t as big a bunch of dunderheads as I usually have to teach.” - Severus Snape, Snarky Overgrown Bat of the Dungeon, Greasy Git, Bastard Extraordinaire, Evil Personified and ever so sexy Potion Master =*

2. “There’s an empty chair at the staff table…. Where’s Snape?”
“Maybe he’s ill!” said Ron hopefully.
“Maybe he’s left,” said Harry, ‘because he missed out on the Defense Against the Dark Arts job again!”
“Or he might have been sacked!” said Ron enthusiastically. “I mean, everyone hates him –”

“Or maybe,” said a very cold voice right behind them, “he’s waiting to hear why you two didn’t arrive on the school train.”

3. ‘Professor Severus Snape, master of this school, commands you to yield the information you conceal!’ Snape said, hitting the map with his wand.

4. “Yes, it is easy to see that nearly six years of magical education have not been wasted on you, Potter. ‘Ghosts are transparent.’”

5. “Your head is not allowed in Hogsmeade. No part of your body has permission to be in Hogsmeade.”

 PUSHING DAISIES

1. ‘…because starting fresh means that something else is ending stale.’ Ned the Piemaker in Pushing Daisies

TWILIGHT

1. ‘I told you so has a brother, Jacob. It’s shut the hell up.’ Bella Cullen

2. ‘Could a dead, frozen heart break? It felt like mine would.
Could a dead, frozen heart beat again? It felt like mine was about to.’

3. ‘Well’, I thought with dark humor, ‘at least she has a guardian vampire.’

FRIENDS
1. ‘I am Chandler. I make jokes when I’m uncomfortable’, Chandler BING

HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER

1. ‘Only 1 in every 83,000,000,000 babies born are conjoined twins. Look it up. It’s a fact. What can we learn from this startling statistic? That pairing up for life is unnatural. In fact, one could go so far as to assume that Mother Nature is against long-term relationships. And I don’t know about you people, but I was raised to always listen to my mother.’

2. ‘You’re still a Scotch-swilling, cigar-smoking, red-meat-eating, gun toting New Yorker’ - Barney Stinson

3. ‘It’s going to be legen -wait for it,, and I hope you’re not lactose-intolerant ’cause the second half of that word is- DARY!’

4. ‘Suits are full of joy. They’re the sartorial equivalent of a baby’s smile’

5. ‘Spoiler alert : the robot falls in love!’

ME
1. ‘I’m starting a new religion with Neil Patrick Harris as my god. All the great guys in the world are either gay or taken. For NPH, both are sadly the case’

2. ‘There is black, there is white, there is grey and there is Severus Snape!’

SNARKY QUOTES


1. Never underestimate the stupidity of others.

2. If you find yourself with a compulsion to kill everyone around you, do not assume that you have a mental health problem, and consider the possibility that everyone around you deserves to die.

3. He who laughs last laughs longest; giving you a perfect opportunity to creep up behind them and hex them.

4. Power corrupts; absolute power corrupts absolutely. You say that like it’s a bad thing.

5. The way to a man’s heart is not through his stomach unless you have a very long knife, but through the breast pocket with a suitably sharp implement.

6. Never trust anyone who says they are right behind you. This either means that they are using you as a human shield, or that they are getting ready to push you off the nearby cliff.

7. Sweat plus sacrifice equals success. No one said who had to provide the sweat, and who was going to be the sacrifice.
8. ‘Sanity is madness put to good uses.’ George Santayana, Little Essays