Cheza is happy today.

Very Happy.

d=(^o^)=b

I am excited for the Faerie Festival on the 20th of this month. I wonder what will be in store.

I went out and had a lot of fun today. And now I’m home getting ready for bed.

Whooosh! Life is crazy. I wonder what it will throw at me next, tomorrow?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Cheza

Already deep into September…and I have been Missing.

Apologies…

I feel abit sad and lost these days.

My future seems to shift farther and father away and life seems dark at the end of the tunnel and a bit scary in some ways that make me often not want to venture down it to find out.

As a result of my feelings, I have been lacking around.

In recent attempts to have fun and feel ‘alive’ I have been doing some damage to my body and to my image (i think) in the eyes of others.

Recently I have not quite fallen in love, but come to very much like and enjoy the company in another. At first i was very shy, as I sometimes can be with people I really am fond of, but when I began to loosen up, I start to become to comfortable to a point that when I do speak up or act up, I end up making my self feel humiliated inside and it makes me want to crawl back into my shell.

Sometimes this person makes me feel very good and happy when i really need it, and other times they make me feel like an annoying, innocent child.

Why do I seem to always be atracted to mostly bad boys? Is it because I am a good girl who secretly wants to be bad, or who gets a thrill out of being bad and they give me a thrill and make me feel alive? I think these personal choices and this lifestlye is dangerous for me…but then again sometimes, when I feel sad again, i do not care.

That is not a good thing, and I know.

But what does thins person really think about me? it’s so hard to see. At first I could tell that he liked me alot and his friends all said so. Sometimes it still seems that way at moments, but in other quick moments, it can all change in a second. It’s makes me sad to also thing that they might move to another counrty soon. I’m not sure if this was a joke or for real, but he said he was going and he was going to take his to friends. I’m not sure if i would want to go, but i was there and nobody mentioned me in the picture at all. I feel like and outsider everywhere  go now, and it’s mostly because I am. The people I grew up with are all gone now and when I kept moving I only moved with people already in deep firendships that I could never fit completely into and now I feel alone and isolated. i have no close friends at the moment and it hurts to watch everyone else having relationships I dream about but lack.

Right now all I have is my ipod and a notebook full of dreams and ideas for a future I might not ever pursue.

Being a Pisces is harsh on me these days, but I am a dreamer…which seems to be all I have right now….

 Till Next time…Chez*Ai

Ps:: My New friend I mentioned, the one I liked, said he was on his way to come see me and chat. That was almost 3 hours ago and it’s very late. I don’t think he’s coming. -sigh-

I’m STILL here, but little by little it’s getting more tolerable. I’m meeting better people. The job & town still suck…but that’s all i’m gonna say. I don’t want to turn this into a hate blog…no one I’m sure wants to here me rant and complaing every blog entry I write. So that ends that.

Anyway, I recenlty bought another ipod video. I had one before but it was stolen along w/ my purse@ sixflags. So then, just until i had enough to get another, Kuma-Kun bought a nano of this kid for me. But i just sold that one to help pay for my new one! (^.^) I’m so happy. I’m such an ipod junkie!

Hopefully I can return to Chi-town soon. I wann go back to my city life. Isn’t city life great? I love how everything you could possibly need/want is within a few block radius! Even if it’s not atleast they have taxis! ….(-.-?) Sorry, i think i was almost getting back to my ranting again.

-sigh- So already I have no privacy and around two tomorrow we pick up another. I’m am going to have even less time. And now that my work schedule changed to day time, it’s hard to work around it and get to the library to post more often. It’s usually closed after I get off, and if before I’m sleeping.

 I know that it might seem hypocitical of me to say I can’t blog but I have time to atleast do the dailies on Neopets everyday, but with the blog, I have no privacy. I’ve tried to write numerous times before but people kept trying to read and it’s very embarassing for me!

Well since I don’t want my blog to become to boring, I’m gonna start posting more colorful? blogs…? lol. I’m not sure but atleast doing that i dont mind as much if people are looking. I was thinking to of getting my hard drive sent up to connect to this computer so i can do more and then I’m gonna go but a connector/charger for my camera so i can post pictures and videos.

That reminds me, i need to take more pics w/ that camera and then post them. Well people are coming home and getting up and hanging out so I’m gonna go. Hopefully I’ll see you 2morrow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BaiBai

I’m so so sorry!

I really want to blog more often and I’m trying so hard to not forget or to find time to do so but it’s difficult. Especially when I have to share the very limited time I already ahd w/ someone else who has come. Just so happens they share my same time, same schedule and even wores is that another comes @ the end of the month so it may be harder but I will for sure find some way by then to get on. I guess I will just have to go visit the libray instead during my free time.

But i’m liking it less and less and less…

I was only suppose to be here for two months:

• The Good news is that this set timing stay is half over.
• The Bad news is that I might have to stay longer.
• The Ugly news is that it could be a way longer stay in a place I just can’t seem to find anything good in.

There are some good places I have been to, or maybe just one. When we went to go to this family get together, surprisingly I did like it there. The mountains and atmosphere was refreshing. Another thing I have just realized that I do enjoy here is how, unlike my  city life, you can smell the rain strongly right after and that’s very nice thing to experience.

 just can’t help it though. I’m from the city, I’m use to the city and I never want to live anywhere but near a city. I don’t like this having to drive 20-30 miles just to feel like I’m somewhere on the map! (Which no surprise this place is not.) Lot of people here think the city is more dangerous. Of course we do have the typical city gang violence but I rather be shot by a gangbanger in the city than dragged to an excluded place in the country where I’ll be hacked into little peices!!! (O.O)!!!

Lol…okay maybe my movie instincts got too much into that last comment.

I’m doing pretty good on Neopets now for the little time I have. When I can get on I’m usually good at making around 20, 000 in the hour I can get in if possible so I have a little over 100,000 nps now. It would be soooo much easier if I could just buy them right? Lol, but that really would throw off the balance of the site BUT if they ever did offer it, even for a day, I would surely take advantage of it. Paintbrushes are very expensive! Most cost around 500,ooo and up! (-.-’) I’m so far behind…

Anyway someone already just got home from work while the other one just got up an another will be home in about 45 min and I have to be to work myself in soon so I have to go now. I WILL update later and try not to be so spacious w/ posting as well. C-Ya! (^.~)V

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Always

                                                                                                             Cheza_Ai

Hey hey

 I’m still in this place…and i’m liking it less every day.

I met this person from work. I thought he was cool…but i see past that now. We still hang but he’s too much … and trouble-prone, sry to say. I don’t mean that he’s not cool to hang out with, but I mean that’s about it.

Then I got my money stolen and was dragged out on thia long trip out of a state i’m not even from into another state i’ve never been too with brainless idiots (so say blandly) giving directions. I mean these people didn’t even know where “they” live.

Before yeasterday I got really sick, had 104 fever and had to go to the hospital. It’s besically all gone now except for my soar throat. The doctor said the test came out negative but noticed it was red and swollen. That made me mad. Because the test were wrong, I had to suffer with this pain of not being able to eat or drink anything or even talk. But it’s slowly going away now.

Nothing else has really been anew. Just work then sleep then work…same. I did take some pictures, though and when i finfish off the rest i will post them.

Well i just wanted to come update really quick. Update later…that is if anything exciting even happens…(”>.>)

BAI BAI xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Cheza

Aa~h!

It’s been a few days huh?

Well i’ve been pretty busy lately w/ my summer job and when I do have free time to get on the internet I’m usually on Neopets anyway… (-.-”)! I made new pets so I have to take care of them i guess! I mostly been addicted to my favorite game on there called Evil Fuzzles from beyond…or somethingh like that. But yes, as I mentioned I did creat new pets! I created Zabuza_Kunz a day or two after Chez_Aoki. I wanted to just name him Zabuza but of course it was taken then Zabuza Kun was taken so I added the Z to kunz. :p Then yeasterday night I created two more! I couldn’t help it! I wish I could have more! (^.^)! So i’ll post them right now::

Chez_Aoki likes reading and learning. For her I decided to collect books to make her really smart. She is the oldest sibling.

Chez_Aoki wishes:: Books and to one day be painted either cloud or striped. I personally think she would look so cute w/ the pink paintbrush but she dosen’t really favor the color much.

Zabuza_Kunz, named after the fierce Nemisis Zabuza of Naruto caring the tough exterior personality but he is really protective of those close to hi, especially his siblings. He is going to be my battle pet. I always wanted to battle but never did. Currently he is training to raise a level at the training school. The only thing was I bought a Bri? Codestone but he needs the Tai Kai? Codesyone. I didn’t know there was a certain on for each subject. But before they never had the ninja school and I just saw that so I am going to make him train there form now on cause Ninjas are cool! :p I haven’t really decided on what I might paint him yet though…

Eien_No Ai, meaning “Eternal Love” is very friendly brother and very close to twin sister ChezKoi. (Their not the same species though but were created seconds apart.) He’s my little gambler. Basically he’s a good guy but with some bad habits but very friendly, caring, and loving. I’m thinking a bout painting him Pirate and having him be a collector of somehting but I haven’t decided on that either yet.

 ChezKoi is the youngest. She’s basically the cute little sibling. She’s very adventerous and innocent but always has a knack for getting into trouble accidently. She is obsessed with Fearies and FearieLand as she likes to visit there alot. I want to paint her too someday but I might find one that sticks with the pinkish coulor. That’s what she request anyway since it’s her favorite color. She likes all things cute and loves plushies so that might be a thing for her.

I have some asperations for my neopets::

• A Neohome

• Petpets

• Painted

There are some other things but I’m not sure on really how far I’m gonna go with this. I definetly want to craete their pages on the site and even give them personal pages on my blog sometime when I get bored and have time.

Other than that, nothing much has happened…well anythingexciting anyway. I’m already meeting lots of coold, fun, and nice people at work. It just sucks that I’m only here for the summer. Who knows, we could keep in touch and I’ll always come back.

Oooh… Yeasterday Caro called me! I haven’t talked to hers since a few months after I moved and my phone broke and I lost all my contacts. I’m so glad she called. She was one of my favorite friends from there.

 Anyhoo I only have a few monents so I hoped on here really quick. I’ll try to get back on tomorrow or what not…well maybe b/c I have work eraly & get off late but maybe tonight if not then then tomorrow night in the early morning. That would make it the day after I guess but to me it’s never the next day until I got to sleep and wake up, not matter what the time! (~.^)

 So baibai for now Sanrio people!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Cheza.

OMG!!!

So I decided to use my new candle for light that I bought the other day and when I awoke the next morning, the end of my pillow case was burning in the flame. I freaked and jumped and when I did I knocked over the candle! (O.O”) Luckily it was a SOY lotion candle so instead of burining everything, it just burned it and melted the case. I guess i was luckly it was that type of candle. So now I recommend it even more.

Today at the store I saw some NeoCash cards at the store. This made me sparatically fall in love w/ Neopets again as it brought back memories of when I use to play on the site years aga. Thus causing me to re-join so look me up! V(^.^) V My first pet was a blue Xweetok.

I named her Chez_Aoki

Neopets has changed soo much since I last been on. But when I saw this pet, I had to have it! Isn’t see a cute one? (^3^)! * I always wanted to have a battledome pet but never did. I don’t know if i’ll use her, but I definetly want one.

While I was doing that the “What’s This” song from The Nightmare Before Christmas oddly popped in my head so I went to youtube to play the song and dicovered some current covers of songs from the movie::

• Fall Out Boy’s did a version of “What’s This”
• Panic @ The  Disco did a version of “This is Halloween”
• Marilyn Manson did a cover of “This is Halloween” too.
• Then Fiona Apple did a version of “Sally’s Song”

I guess I liked these covers b/c I just loved the original songs so much! It’s something different and I like that. So check them out @ youtube and see what you think. I would post the videos myself but Sanriotown blog dosen’t seem to want to let me post foreign videos besides the ones you can make on the site. So if any one knows how to do this, or if an admin sees my bog post and can given me any answer like if it’s allowed and if so, how do I do this, Thanks.

Well, that’s all the news for now. C-U-L8ter! ;p!

~~~~~~~~~Cheza

こんにちは!!

「~あ…

なつかしい Chi-town y Kuma-Kun…

Today I bought a very cool candle. It’s Passion flower and it’s 100% lotion! Is than not cool?! You burn it, then when it melts, you pour it into your hand and it becomes lotion! すごい ね~?

I didn’t take any pictures today. (u_u) ごめんなさい… I forgot my camera. I promise tomorrow I will try to remember.

Hehe…ATHF is on. (^o^) My favorite character is Master Shake! He’s sooo funny! I like when he messes with meatwad. These are my favorite three episodes::

1.  Video Ouija - I just thought it was so funny when Shake kils himself just to beat Metwad in the game but when he does, Meatwad dosen’t want to play anymore.
2. Dumber Dolls - The only part I really like here is at the end when shake says. “Let’s see how much your a** knows about flying!” And throws him off the cliff. Then he jumps
3. MC Pee Pants - I  LOVE the I want candy song! (♥.♥)

The show is soo funny. (I think any way.) But alot of people don’t seem to find it as humourous but that’s okay.

It’s only my second though. My first favorite show from adult swim is The Boondocks! I even bought the 1st season! (^.^) I’m sure more people would find the humor here alot funnier. I even bought the book of all the comic strips. Riley is my favorite character here. My favorite ep is “Let’s Nab Oprah” I like this one b/c it also feats. Ed and Rummy and they are CRAZY! I like how Rummy likes to repeat quotes from Samuel Jackson’s Juels character in Pulp Fiction.

Well i wanted to post videos but it’s not letting me.

-sigh-

Maybe later i’ll figure something out but for now it’s already 2.am and i think i’m gonna get off now…

さようなら!

また明日!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Cheza

你好吗？!!!

See? Toldja I’d be back! (^.^)!

 Hehe…so anyway…

I got a camera today. It is disposable but it should hold off until I can get a charger and things for my digital one.

Today, I decided to share one of my favorite websites. It’s caller “Orsinal” and it has a collective of the most cutest (and addicting) flash games. My favorite is called Winter bells and from the original site you can play it by clicking on the the bell (the third icon in the first row i think?).

Click the picture to go to the website.

Well I got some things to do now…

So 拜拜。 4 now! (^.^)*

AAAAALLLLLLOOOOOOOHHHHAAAAAAAAAA

HK Online! (^.^)!

It’s been awhile! But i’m back and for good!

Today I left my new recent home and traveled just abit away. It will only be for two months. Well ‘originally’ it would be two months but i might be only one.  Regardless, I have easy access to a computer and internet. usually had acess but it was on this Verizon Pocket PC but it would never let me long onto this site! Besides that updating my blog would be a pain on such a device anyway… But Cheza has returned!

Mostly likely if possible I will be gain to post almost daily like before, updating my blog with post of my random days. Eventually i’ll put up pictures, but at the moment i do not have a charger or a piece to connect it to the comp. Bust soon, within the week, i should get this.

Preievously before I had posted of how I read that this year was going to be a good on for me, and I felt it as well. So far it has been okay, I guess abit better than the past few, but overall just ‘fair’. But soon that will all change. I will be moving to Chi-Town perfectly. (I’m already getting into all this local crazy Cubs/Sox Baseall drama! The fans are so funny when you meet two from opposites sides. Oh…the battles are adrenaline rushes of excitement themselves. All competive commens and talk it so exciting to be a part of. As well, Kuma-kun has been getting me into the Bears. At least this is a team all of Illinois can agree on. Even though I have newfound admiration for the Bears (and the sport), I will still stay true to my original team, but that’s a *Secret*. Kuma-Kun has been getting me into alot of these sports lately. Even soccer. He’s a big fan of Chivas and i have com to like them as well. This became when we watched their match against America not too long ago. Any one seen this remember? It would be unforgetable  to true fan since both teams are on top at the moment.

But i guess I got a little off subject…(-.-’)

The year is now at the midpoint and this is where  belive it will be better. Besides getting to visit here and get away to this country place, I will soon go back to my beloved city for it to only get better. I’ll be having my ‘OWN’ apt. finally! No parents…or strangers. Of course i’ll be sharing. (>.>)……

It’s gonna be so much fun…

So much freedom…

So much independence….

These are things I like to have/feel. I’m just so excited, I just can’t wait. As well I have some other things coming ahead, projetcs, it will keep me unbored at least.

 Anyhoo…I’m going to go now.

Goodnight. (^.^) *