“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it…” The biblical proverb on childhood discipline applies not only to the manner by which we raise and discipline our children but also in the way that we inculcate in them life-long study habits.
Larcy Morales de Castro is a hands-on, full-time, mother of nine children. Yes, you read that right – nine. Her children’s ages range from 23 to five years old. If the proof is in the pudding, de Castro who is married to a heart surgeon, can proudly say that she has baked all nine pies, close to perfection. The nine de Castro children all excel in either academics, sports or music; some of them in all three. Three children in college have chosen to take the path of medicine, one of them in the prestigious Intarmed program at the U.P. ; one child has great talent in computer graphics and design; another is a soccer star; one child is a gifted musical wizard and the four youngest girls do exceptionally well in the elementary and pre-school levels.
De Castro says that she started going fully hands-on with homework beginning with child number six. “In the beginning, the babies came one after another and so it was really difficult for me to tutor them all at the same time,” she recalls. The two eldest boys were sent to tutorial centers for the early years, but the two older girls were personally taught by their mother until the second grade. “After that, they were on their own,” de Castro relates. She explains that as they were growing up, she saw a big difference in the learning process of those who went to the tutorial centers versus those she chose to teach at home. “When you sit down and spend time with them, you are able to see up close what is that they really need and whether they are able to understand the lessons. You can also adjust your methods to the skills and capabilities of each child,” she explains. De Castro stresses that she doesn’t spoon-feed the kids and allows them to learn on their own, explore and develop at their own pace. She emphasizes that study time should be fun and relaxing so that the kids will look forward to it. She also adds that parents must invest in the early years, ideally up to the second grade, and after that they can slowly let go.
The sentiment is echoed by Joyce Santos, an engineer by training and profession, who opted to quit her full-time job once she started having children. Nowadays, her afternoons are fully devoted to sons Enzo, 13 and Theo, 8. Santos has been able to put her engineering skills to use when she sits down to do homework with Theo whose method of learning is highly visual. The engineer-mom, creatively, and painstakingly draws each and every lesson for him because she knows that this is the best way for him to learn. She structures his lessons in such a manner where the skills she learned in college by graphing and tabulating some of the more complicated subject matters. “It’s the younger one now that I need to supervise because the oloder one already knows how to study on his own so I don’t have to worry about him.” The two boys though, study together with mom. “Role-modelling is also very important,” Santos says.
Cardiologist Peachy Agunod Cheng, is another firm believer in starting good study skills early. Eldest son, Adriel, 14 is a consistent Dean’s lister at the Philippine Science High School which was also his mother’s high school alma mater. Cheng says that in the early years, a parent should try to encourage a love for reading and math, as well as good study habits.
“ I would sit beside him and make him try to do the homework by himself. When I see he has not yet fully understood the concept or the lesson to be able to do the homework with ease, I teach him step by step and give him practice exercises, then still make him do the homework by himself. Then we check it together, then I explain the mistakes.”
Like De Castro, Cheng believes that children need to be rested and relaxed before they start studying. “Let them take merienda and allow them to rest a little before they plough into their studies,” she says. In the Cheng home, TV is restricted to 30minutes on weekdays and only when all the school work is finished. Cheng explains that the study routine needs to be set early in life – “When the daily routine gets followed, the child will take it for granted that studying/ doing homework is something he should do - like eating, playing and sleeping. There won’t be a need to “force” the child anymore to begin homework.”
All three moms believe that incentives are a good thing as well – whether is is additional TV time, or some other fun activities, rewards can be a good thing when used discreetly and judiciously. Below are some tips to help parents make homework time less stress-free…
1. Santos says that a photocopier at home would be a very good investment. “Nowadays, there are 4 in-1 printers that can do all ythe work,” she says. If it is within the family budget, get one to save on time andf money by not having to photocopy worksheets outside or hand-write each and every exercise down.
2. Home-school collaboration is also key to the learning process and de Castro says it helps to keep in touch with the teacher and school to be fully aware of what is being taught in school, the homework given, and future projects to be submitted. De Castro is grateful that the PAREF school system strongly emphasizes and supports the value of home-school collaboration. “Make sure you have the telephone numbers of your co-parents and your child’s teacher, on-hand.”Keep in close contact with co-parents and class parent officers to get updates with homework and exams and form your own support system.
3. Cheng emphasizes on ensuring that the child has rested and taken merienda before he does his homework. A sentiment strongly echoed by Santos and de Castro who add that homework time should not be too close to bedtime either because children do not think and work efficiently when they are sleepy. Cheng says an hour’s break for merienda, to freshen up and laze around is sufficient. “Give them a 15-break also in between lessons or subjects, “ she suggests. Santos makes her boys go to the bathroom before she sits them down, “That way, they are already done with their business and they can focus on the work on hand.”
4. Have a good study area, with good ventilation and lighting, that is set up away from the TV and from other distractions. De Castro says that some children are inspired when there is light classical music playing in the background. “Find out what enhances your child’s learning, or what enhances their concentration and support them by playing that kind of music at home.” Santos has her son’s desk face an area where there are no distractions. ‘When he’s done with his work, he goes plays with his Lego toys.”
5. Buy textbooks in the same grade-vel as your child that are used by other good schools. At the start of the schoolyear, Santos purchased books used at the Ateneo and La Salle and she uses the worksheets there during homework time. “Sometimes the hard part is in thinking of questions or exercises for the kids to answer. The task is made easier by using those in other textbooks. It’s the same lesson anyway, but the exercises are different so this technique will save you some time and effort as well.” Santos uses a lot of visual aids that she draws herself (she’s an engineer after all!) and says that with children whose learning process is of the visual type, this mathod of teaching is most helpful. “You must know your child’s learning style and adjust your teaching method to it.”
6. De Castro buys school supplies and art materials ahead of time so that she doesn’t get harrassed when they are needed. “I buy magazines from places like Booksale – titles like National Geographic and airline magazines are a staple because they have very good photos that can be used for projects.” When they have good quality materials, they are more eager to work on the project and they are very proud of their work afterwards.
7. Cheng plays a game with her younger daughter to help her focus and concentrate on the work. “She likes princesses and fairy tales and I draw a girl, a castle, a ball gown and a tiara, and connect these wth dashed lines. Then I tell her, the princess is relying on her to help her find her tiara and gown, and go to the castle. If my daughter is good with her lessons, the princess will be in time for her ball. Each correct answer connects two dashes together, until the line is completed leading to the castle. Before you know it, the homework is done.” This is a good technique to use with children below the age of six as it holds their attention.
8. For math, teach the concept first. Like for addition and subtraction, have marbles or objects ready for counting when you add/ take away from, then show how many you have finally. When the concept is grasped, you can then teach the shortcuts, maybe even memorize certain answers. De Castro says that she has found flashcards to be very helpful too.
9. It is important for moms to know when to take a break. De Castro says that when she starts to feel tired she calls a time-out. “Usually 20 minutes is sufficient. If you feel you’re about to get cranky, stand up, stretch and give all of yourselves a break.”
At the end of the day, homework time and learning has to be a fun exercise for both the parent and child. “A child is a child and not a learning machine,” Cheng says. “Children will need their playtime, and a lot of love from their family. A happy child will always be capable of learning more. With a loving family, good study habits, and an inquisitive mind, the possibilities for any child will be endless,” she closes.
the Duty Free Shops downtown and it is a brief 15-minute ride to get to the landmark. Whenever we are there, we always encounter Japanese tourists and a newly-wedded couple who come to the area to have the traditional photo-op. Apparently, a “shoot” Two Lover’s Point is always part and parcel of the wedding package 
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