10,000 years ago, we were powerful beings who roamed the galaxy… doing… well, stuff. One day while watching the Milky Way spin around, we got bored and decided to conquer a planet or something. Maybe the universe, who knows.

And then in a bright flash of light, and a loud moo-ing sound, we fell into a deep dark mass of… well, dark stuff.

It was actually kinda fun for a few hundred years, what with those hide-and-hope-you-find-each-other-within-the-year games. And we didn’t even have to comb our hair or shave or anything, coz… yeah we couldn’t see each other.

*cough*

Moving on. Well, Earthlings, we are back. And we are sharing with you this account of just how exactly we will be taking over the world. Or the universe, whichever comes first.